Why Every Kid Getting a Trophy is Ruining Sports (and My Sanity)
Look, I get it. We all want our kids to feel special, celebrated, and confident. But somewhere along the way, youth sports has turned into a participation parade where every kid, no matter how much effort they put in, walks away with a shiny, plastic trophy. And honestly? It’s making sports less fun—for them and for us parents.
The Death of Competition (and Effort)
Back in the day (am I showing my age yet?), if you wanted a trophy, you had to earn it. You had to run faster, play harder, practice longer, and actually, you know, win. But now? The child, who spent most of the soccer season twirling in circles and picking dandelions, came home with the same medal as the kid who scored 10 goals in a game.
What message does that send? That effort doesn’t matter? That just showing up is good enough? I understand that this may be the norm for kids 8 and under, but at some point we have to move away from everyone being rewarded for simply showing up.
I don’t know about you, but I’d rather my kids learn that hard work leads to rewards, not that a plastic trophy fairy sprinkles them out to everyone regardless of effort.
Where’s the Motivation?
Kids are smart. When they realize they don’t have to try hard to get the same reward as the kid who put in extra effort, guess what happens? They stop trying. They lose the drive to push themselves, to improve, to set goals and reach them. And isn’t that kind of the whole point of sports?
I’ve seen it firsthand—teams where kids lack that spark, that hunger to win, because, well, why bother? They’re getting the same prize either way. And as a parent, it’s frustrating to watch because I want my kids to experience that feeling of working hard toward something and achieving it. It’s way more satisfying than a dusty participation trophy that’ll end up in a donation box six months later.
Learning to Lose is Important, Too
Nobody likes losing, but it’s a part of life. And if kids don’t learn how to handle it in sports, where the stakes are relatively low, how will they handle it in the real world? Will they expect participation raises at work? Consolation prizes in college? A “thanks for trying” paycheck?
Losing teaches resilience. It builds character. It forces kids to ask, “How can I do better next time?” instead of assuming rewards are handed out like Halloween candy. And let’s be real—wouldn’t you rather raise a kid who can bounce back from disappointment instead of one who crumbles at the first sign of failure? Think about it.
Let’s Bring Back Earned Trophies
I’m not saying we should turn kids’ sports into a Hunger Games-style showdown where only one child leaves victorious. But we can start making trophies meaningful again. Celebrate the kids who put in the extra work, who improved the most, who showed the best teamwork or sportsmanship. Let participation be its own reward—because sometimes, just playing the game is fun enough.
At the end of the day, sports should teach kids life lessons—about effort, resilience, and achievement. And if we keep handing out trophies like Oprah giving away cars, we’re missing the point.
What do you think? Should we bring back the good old days of earning trophies, or am I just a grumpy sports mom? Let me know in the comments!
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